Table for 1
It's not unusual for people to eat alone for breakfast or even lunch, but why does it seem so very odd when people go out to dinner alone?
Having dinner at a lovely restaurant alone may be taboo to some, but I think that this is the ultimate way to experience a meal. The atmosphere of the restaurant is not covered up by the others at the table, and you can savor your food rather than eating fast so that you can answer someone's question. An aggravating or embarrassing tablemate can totally destroy the whole experience, wasting your money and time. The luxury of solo dining is unparalleled for true foodies.
Restaurant Selection
If you want to dip your toe into the world of solo dining and don't have particular restaurants in mind, you may want to consider places with seating conducive to your mission. A number of notable restaurants have seating along an open kitchen so that you can get lost in the action.
Chef Eric Cook of Gris Gris and Saint John prefers operating open-kitchen restaurants, especially when diners can sit facing the cooking areas. He explained, "My favorite thing that I love about the industry is the interaction. It's the ability to connect with your guest on a level that's very intimate. There's nothing more intimate than feeding people, but cooking things in front of people and having an interaction with them, it's very similar to my home life. It can be a form of self-expression like any other art."
Chef Cook has referred to his interactive dining areas as "Broadway" and "ballet." "No matter what's going on, when you step onto that stage, you have to be in character. It's an expectation. It's a preconceived notion that we have to tell a story just through our movements and our actions about what kind of restaurant we are. You're creating a memory," he concluded.
For the advanced solo diner, I suggest you choose places that you want to understand fully, from the atmosphere to the drinks and the food. Go to restaurants that you would be remiss to experience if you were too distracted with a table full of people pulling you out of a new encounter and into the familiar.
Between Bites Activities
The biggest question you may have about solo dining is what to do while you're waiting for food. You can indulge in any number of entertainment options that don't include mindless phone scrolling.
Read a Book - This is a classic and classy option. I used to go through books at a voracious pace while I was in school. I would read before classes started, and those short bursts of time added up, but I find myself thoroughly unable to flip even a few pages of a book these days unless I'm on a plane. If you find that you don't have the time or attention span to just sit down and read in the digital age, a great meal alone and out of the comfort of your home can be the perfect setting for that book you've been waiting to enjoy.
Coloring - I love restaurants that have paper tablecloths and bring crayons out for patrons to indulge in some doodling throughout their visit. There's a very good reason that restaurants do this—coloring can be beneficial to you. According to several studies, people of any age who color may experience a reduction of anxiety and stress, promotion of mindfulness, and bursts of creativity. There are so many kinds of coloring books available at bookstores and gift shops around town, many of which are intricate designs geared towards adults.
Be a Critic - You don't have to be a published food critic to be a food critic. Taking notes about your meal may allow you to experience cuisine on a deeper level than you can when you're more concerned about conversations with your dinner mates than the food you're eating. There are some excellent dining journals that have prompts to organize your thoughts. A large collection of tasting notes can be a fascinating thing to peruse. You may even learn things about yourself and your proclivities that you never realized before.
How to Deal With Haters
Most of the time when I eat alone, I don't notice anyone noticing me. There have been a handful of occasions, however, when people stared, looked uncomfortable, or seemingly made comments about me to their companions. And, yes, there was one occasion when someone laughed at me dining alone. These petty displays don't bother me because it says a lot more about them than it does about me.
Those considering solo dining may be worried about being on the receiving end of those side-eye glances and smirks, but I assure you that the fact that you're confident enough to do what you're doing means you're winning. Those haters could never do what you're doing because they lack poise and aplomb.
The best way to stick it to the haters is not to notice them in the first place. Focus on your chosen activities, ask questions of your server, and enjoy time in your own little world. You could also give a cheery wave to those staring at you to let them know just how awkward they're behaving.
Don't be surprised when you begin this journey about how a whole new world will now open up for you. Unfettered and free, people will start asking you how you do it alone and how was the food.
