Madison LaGrone

If you want this Mardi Gras to be the best one yet, there are a few things that you should consider before heading out to the parade route.

Transportation:
Don’t drive to the parade route. Parking will be difficult to find, and you will inevitably be drinking. Viable options include biking, walking, or taking the streetcar in areas where the lines are still running, not having been obstructed by the parades. Looking those up in advanced, online, or in a local publication, is advised. As for the end of the day or night, always have money for a cab home in case you have a little too much fun and don’t last as long as your friends. While it can be difficult to get a cab during Mardi Gras, they are always running. Put a few different companies’ numbers in your cell phone in case of emergencies.

Location:
Rather than aimlessly wandering around the parade route, strategically pick a spot to stand. But again, check out the parade route in advance, so you’ll know what to expect. It helps to be aware of how many hours you’ll be standing on the neutral ground so you know how much sustenance to fill your backpack with. Make sure the location is within the vicinity of a bathroom, preferably a free one. It helps to have a few dollar bills for the porta-potties that are privately owned; people will often allow strangers to use theirs for a fee. But for the love of God, do not use the restroom outside. It is the one crime NOPD seem adamant about enforcing during this city-wide free-for-all. Not only will you be arrested, but you will spend the entirety of Mardi Gras in central lockup. Churches and community centers often offer restroom usage for a small donation, while stores and fast food restaurants usually require a purchase with the use of the bathroom. Even Burger King will insist on seeing a receipt before you use their restroom. Thus, when choosing a location to watch the parades, ensure that there is a bathroom within eyesight.

Food:
Bring snacks! Yes, you will inevitably buy a Domino’s personal pan pizza from the vendors on wheels once you’re drunk, but you can help stave off cravings with items brought from home. Bags of chips and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches are great choices for eating once the drinking has begun. Similarly to an outdoor music festival, food will always be available but it will be pricey, so plan ahead.

Drinks:
Make sure you bring plenty of beverages to sustain you for a whole day of debauchery. Large containers that can easily be refilled are best: Nalgene bottles or CamelBaks are popular ways to hold copious amounts of beer or liquor. Drinks sold on the parade route or at nearby bars will probably be over-priced and the crowds will be large. Although it is always better to have more than you need rather than less, know your limits and you can maintain a buzz for an entire day or evening without having to head home early.

What to watch out for:
Babies: Every year, people bring their infants and toddlers to Mardi Gras. No one knows why, but they do it anyway, so it’s your job to watch out for them. An unwieldy spear could bring about a parent’s wrath. Keep your hands and throws to yourself.
The elderly: Don’t mess with an old lady and her Mardi Gras beads. They have been here longer than you, they know what they’re doing and they are set in their ways.
The drunk: It’s the same rule that applies to a night out on the town: Don’t engage obscenely drunk people. Their reasoning is never very good. No matter how badly you want that coconut, safety is of utmost importance.